Ole Miss/Bama weekend (Special Thanks to Hooters)

Well 2 of your favorite average joes embarked on an epic journey this weekend. Steve's Rebels vs Heath's Tide. A previous post from one of our best friends begged for prayers of our saftety. We're excited to post that we both made it back alive. A full account of our activities will be posted later, but for now, I just needed to share our last stop with you. Upon leaving Tuscaloosa, we stopped at the local Hooters to look at something better than each other, rehydrate our bodies, and eliminate our whiskey hangovers (yeah, somebody call Harry's by the way and tell them they need to order more House Whiskey b/c these Joes drank them out of house and home). Having lived in Tuscaloosa for 4 years, I knew that we could not drink beer on Sunday there for the NFL games, but this was not a problem as we were probably still a little buzzed from Saturday night. Thank you to our Goodfellas loving waitress Lindee.... and to Jess, who does a GREAT Brodie Croyle impersonation, for making our last stop one of our best ones. Whoever invented Hooters, I need to shake your hand...and furthermore whoever decided to let these girls wear football jerseys deserves a raise.

--Heath



















This is definately the best that Brodie Croyle has looked this year...Hell, with all props to my buddy Brodie, maybe if you looked like this ... NFL Defenses would let you actually finish a game.











A couple Goodfellas in their own right with Lindee, the gorgeous vixen from Tuscaloosa.

Steve's Take on BahrBryant Town

Holee Shit! When we got out of Mobile that Saturday morning the drive was going pretty normal until we hit the "nuthin' but woods" part of southwest Alabama. Then like an organized attack squadron hell bent on redneckdom, they merged on the highway with Tuscaloosa the target. Every damn car was Crimson. A sense of panic came over my Rebel ass as I realized I'm in BFE on the highway surrounded by these people. Folks, it was like a remake of those Mad Max movies in the desert where they were hopped up on shit driving dune buggies. Only these guys were probably hopped up on meth: "Damn Sheila...it's three hours to 'Loosa! We got enough shit to last till we get to Buford's trailer on the Quad?"

The game was what it was. Alabama came out and ripped us a new asshole in the first half. Then they went in the locker room. The Tide was celebrating or something like the game was already over. Someone forgot to tell them Coach O is no longer our turdtastic coach. He was replaced by a man who is completely bat shit crazy. Maybe Bama just coasted through the second half (b/s) but it spoke volumes of Ole Miss to go into the second half and respond the way they did. But bottom line.... the better team one. Still, Snead is one bad mofo.

After the game, Bama fans want to say good game and shit like that. Like us hanging in there till the end was some kind of moral victory. Moral Victories are for deaf kids trying to play bingo and sidewalk Bama alumni. I bet if  the Rebs had won, I would have had to run for my life. 

Ate at Jupiter's. Turkey wrap hit the spot, beer was ice cold, and our waitress had on a loose T-shirt and yet you could still see these beautiful (and real..) sweater puppies bouncing as she walked. God bless her. Went to Harry's. Had some Old Crow. Told a girl in the bar I was an OBGYN. I told her she should let me take a look at her. She thought I was funny. Like, retarded funny.

Went to Hooter's before we left town. Those damn girls in there were fine as hell. Better the skanktastics we got in Mobile and Biloxi. They had a guy manager there who walked around like he was the man up in there. I was jealous of him for no reason and thought of ways of sneak attacking him while I ate my wings. Still, it was a good trip. An Ole Miss victory would have made it sweeter.